Life the universe and everything in it

So I've come to the conclusion of I have not been on in forever and currently I'm chilling a kim's which is pretty cool cause I haven't really just chilled somewhere in a long time I'm always on the go as of late like its freaking crazy and I've decided that finding my tape recorder was the coolest thing ever cause I got to get off like all the things that I've been thinking and now I can go back and listen to it so that is pretty boss I'm not gonna lie......(I love giant run on sentence's hence the giant sentence of DOOM above....) So life is good like really good except I'm jobless which kinda sucks cause I need a job like soon cause I need money did you know that a a good cheap speaker and pa set up for a mic is 260 dollars and thats cause there is a special going on and its half off that is freaking crazy what the junk. Yea so life is good I have absolutely nothing to complain about than again I normally don't have things to complain about so yea ummmmm the only thing I'm really hoping is that a friend can get her way cause I really think she deserves it no matter what anyone thinks so yea I just really have no clue I hope it all works out for her..... OH and starting a band not really sure what I'm going to do though cause Jason is drumming and I suck at guitar the only thing I can do is write songs and sing but knowing oZ he will want to sing so I'm really trying to figure out what I'm going to do in this whole and thing but hey whatev's right if all else fails I will just have to end up doing my own thing which I think would kinda be boring cause the more people you have is kinda way more exciting so hopefully this all works out so yea thats been my life in a nut shell and in 3 or 4 huge run on sentences cause punctuation is for those who are currently in english classes and I don't have to worry about that till January so I'm going to continue writing run on sentences until than so PEACE and LOVE to anyone who has decided to read this hopefully you find something more entertaining or hopefully this made your day more entertaining or if your a blog stalker than this would be part of your day and yes KIM that means you hahahaha just kidding so yea LATERS

HahAHahAHa

Well haven't been on this thing in a little while and I honestly have nothing to say what does that say about me am I boring or do I just not have any problems or what or it may be the fact that I haven't done crap. OOH except pick matt's dumb ass up from Globe luckily he is back and shit is all worked out but yea we are all good and shit is good and today is boring and I maybe leaving to Phoenix in two to three weeks or I may go to Payson for like 2 months and chill there with Levi while he is there and than leave him and go to Phoenix after the 2 months so this next month should be very very interesting I have no clue..

=/ hmmmm

I thought you of all people would know what I'm going through cause you left a guy after six months for some dude cause he decided he liked you and I thought that you would understand this....And in fact she is the same age as you have friends even though you aren't with me they aren't going to change being your friend cause I'm not with you and what do you need to tell me...But I figured you would know what was going on but you know whatever you always have Hair cause from what I hear you sure as hell are flirty with him

Old song anoyone likes let me know

She Woke up this morning with one thought on her mind how do I make it, how do I make it today. He woke up this morning with one dreams in his mind how do I make it where she is just mine. He wanted her free he just wanted her to be. She walks down the road with no where left to go she wants to be happy but this is the only road she knows. He wanders alone on down the road he loves her he needs her, but he doesn't know where to go. He just can't bring his thoughts from the feelings that tear him away. She wants him she needs him but she doesn't know what to say to make him stay.

Why does that bother me

You know what I really hate is when I piss someone off and they go hangout with someone who likes them and it bothers me cause its normally a I'm getting back at you thing and that bugs the shit out of me cause sure she is alot better than most but hey it wouldn't be the first time that someone has tried this tactic on me and you know what it still bugs the shit out of me cause I mean seriously why do that its stupid and there is no reason to do it especially if your mad I mean this may be worse cause today just kinda sucked and I was just pissed off all day cause first the fat red neck with his nazi symbol tattoo he just fuckin pissed me off so bad i've never wanted to break someones fact so bad in my entire life I just wanted to keep hitting him and hitting him till he bleed and died right there on the spot its people like him that give people in general a bad name, but feeling that rage was just intense I had to completely leave the place cause I was so pissed and I was so close to just punching him and kickin him till he was dead and I just thought that it would be right and just to kill this one fat man I felt that it would do the world some good and the world would be a better place with this fat ugly dumb incompetent asshole gone and I realized its not my place to judge but at that moment I just felt just I just felt that that was what was right and I had to leave because I knew that if I didn't I would beat the shit out of this man like I knew that he would not leave that place if I stayed there and it frieghtend me cause I have never felt such hate or anger cept to my dad and I just realized after the rage and realized what I was thinking was close to being a reality that I had to leave cause I wouldn't be able to control it and that scared me I had never felt that pressure or that anger I knew that I was not me and that he would no longer walk and I just left and that carried with me the rest of the day and I was intentionally going out of my way all day to try and start fights with people for that soul fact of I was pissed and I need to relieve it and I realized that I was a horrible person for doing that and that I right than and there should walk out into the street and get hit by a car but I didn't cause I didn't want oZ or erica to have to witness or see that but I just felt that I should just walk in front of a car and die that me dying would make the world a better place and that I should just disappear from the face of the earth and I'm glad I didn't do it but at the same time a piece of me says why didn't you it says you know you wanted to and that you know you just wanted to be gone and not hurt anyone I really honestly saw that today is the first time in my life that I honestly can't look at myself in the mirror that I honestly hate and dispise myself ...

Gotta get that...Gotta get that...Boom Boom Boom

So have you ever had someone elses mood effect you to the point where they are sad or depressed and you start to realize it is also affecting you... Well I do believe that is happening to me and it makes me sad because I feel there is nothing I can do to help and it crushes me to know that I can't help someone who is close to me....I also hate the fact that along this sadness trip that she has gotten a hell of a lot quieter and doesn't speak her mind at all and I have a hunch its because the fact that if she opens her mouth she thinks or knows that someone may or will shoot down her idea or argue with her or something I don't know and I hate knowing that it is my fault I mean I don't do it alot and I find when I do do it I need to just shut up because I'm arguing just cause I sometimes like to argue and I really need to not do that cause if it hurts her and drives her away or turns her into the shy quiet girl again, I will just not know what to do to make it better (sorry for the one long run on sentence). So I really don't know if anyone has noticed but as she gets sadder or more depressed I follow her in hopes that I will some how be able to find a way to make things better and that has yet to happen but I sure as hell can hope that it will happen and hopefully very soon.....

If you calling at two in the morning it only means on thing......Booty Call

So the new Black Eyed Peas is dope I'm not gonna lie its actually pretty sick....Well I haven't really said much as of late there isn't a whole lot going on cept I've come to the realization the she is alot more quiet as of recently like she doesn't speak her mind or say what she wants to, and that kinda scares me a little like I don't even know. Then I also have to get Hair back his charge cord but its in Levis Truck and he is in Payson so I feel bad about that sorry Hair I will get that back to you A.S.A.P. So yea its been pretty alright as of late chillin with oZ again which is pretty bitchin I missed that kid more than I realized and I'm glad that Forney is gone I love him like a brother but he has become kind of an asshole to everyone but me really its kinda really annoying. I also have realized I need to start shutting up more and not saying stupid things round Kim cause I've realized that even little things I say can upset her or make her sad and I don't want her to be sad at all and she has been sad as of recent and it probably doesn't help that they don't have a set place to live and that makes me really sad like really bummed out. Then I am staying in Show Low for another six months or at least until the next semester of college is over I'm kinda bummed to be staying her but at the same time I'm glad because I can be around Kim for longer so yea that is basically all I have for now so I will rant or something later......